True love: fake or reality. True love is like a polar star that shows sailors”’ paths to the shore. When they wander in the sea.
True love is like a polar star. Because of the four components compassion, loving-kindness, freedom, and joy.
Love added these four-component to our life. Which helps us to navigate our life out from life wandering.
Here a question arises why love? Because love is the conscience or cognitive behaviour inculcated in our life from birth
Because of love, we take care of our family, friends and relative. Love is the glue that fixes us with each other. Love keeps us resting in peace in this world.
In this article, we are going to discuss.
1. The meaning of true love.
2. Four components of true love.
3. The four mantras to practice true love.
The meaning of true love.
The best way to understand the meaning of true love. We use William Shakespeare. “True love” sonnet number 116
According to William Shakespeare. “True love” sonnet number 116
In this sonnet writer attempt to understand the meaning of true love. According to the writer, love is the foundation of two like-minded people. While facing all the obstacles in their way. (marriage of true minds amid impediment)
Love is constant and unchangeable in any condition and circumstances.
Love is not to be removed, erase and shaken. Love is not wipeout by the wave of trouble in life (love as ever fixed look on tempest and never shaken).
Love is like a star that guides the boat (wandering bark) of life in the wave of the world.
Love is like a star, its value is beyond the measure. But its height can be measured.
Love is beyond the power of time. Thought time has power who destroyed the rosy lips and cheeks.
Love not to change according to passes of the hour and week but last until Doomsday.
If I am right about this or proven wrong. I never wrote and, no man ever love.
So, true love will not restrict by the chain of past and future, like or dislike, rich and poverty and busty and ugly. True love is indestructible. It is the light of god’s. Which helps to come out from darkness to light. Compassionate us to understand others. It is the gift of God that makes us human and different from animals.
The four components of true love.
1. Compassion (Karuna)- Compassion means understanding the feeling of your beloved or your loved ones. If you do not understand the feeling. You will not able to love.
If you will not understand the deepest sorrow, deepest aspiration, and deepest trouble of your beloved. How do you love her/deeply?
For example, your wife’s parent is in trouble. When you know this, you sympathize with your wife. Give her consolation that not take stress everything will be ok.
No doubt, this gave her some consolation. But the trouble is not ended. So, it,s bothered her always. She also wants that you will help her parents.
But hesitate to say you, if your boundation with your wife is Deep and you understand the feeling. You know her problem by her expression.
Ture love helps you to understand her deepest sorrow and trouble and eliminate it.
So, try to understand your beloved feeling deeply. It,s make your foundation tight and tighter.
2. Loving-kindness (Maitri)- True love inculcate loving-kindness and benevolence in our heart.
Love is not only to fill the life of your beloved with joy and happiness. But true love helps you to feel the aspiration and suffering of your beloved.
There is no doubt, that parents love their children and care about them. But sometimes the care and love pinch them.
Because we impose our decision on children. Like, we decided which career they select. Especially for girls.
These activities pinch them. So, true love teaches us to understand the aspiration of our children. You only have to guide them.
The relationship is like a rose plant. And love is manure for nurturing the plant. If the manure is excess it harms the plant.
So, appreciate the aspiration and feeling. This is the mantra of true love.
3. Freedom (Swatantrata)- Everybody needs privacy and space. When we enter this zone. This makes others insecure.
Many times we restrict our wife, boyfriend or girlfriend, and beloved. Because we love them and want to secure them.
But, somewhere it restricts their privacy. Your restriction makes the reason behind the separation.
So, true love is not only feeling your beloved free from the outside but also on the inside. True love, helps to build your trust solid as a rock.
A gold chain gives us as much pain as an iron chain. Because both grip with the same strength.No matter how good slavery is, it makes us slaves.
4. Joy (Mudita)- If there is no joy there is no true love. If you suffer, cry and make the person you love cry all the time. So, this is not a symptom of true love
In true love, you feel that the whole world is in joy. You fill your beloved life with joy. Your search for your happiness in others’ happiness.
These components help you to identify the status of true love in your heart. If the symptoms of these components are shown in your activity. You are on right track.
The four mantras to practice true love.
1. Your time is gold for your beloved-
We do hard work to increase our living standards. Want to give all the comfort to our beloved.
Because of the hectic schedule of our work. We do not give proper time to our family or beloved.
But this practice is not right. Because it took away us from our loved ones.
For example on the occasion of the birthday of his child. Father asked his child, what do you want as gifts for his birthday.
After a lot of thinking child replied. I want your presence at my birthday party.
Because his father was a rich businessman. so, he wasn’t given proper time for his family. Wasn’t attended any occasion of the family or his child.
So, his presence is a precious gift for his child. He wants to enjoy every moment of his life with his father. Like his other friends.
Therefore, time is more precious than gold. we can’t give value to our time.
You can’t buy time with your money. When the time was gone. It never comes back.
So, enjoy every moment of life and ensure our presence all the time. When your beloved needs.
You use these mantras for practising true love.
“Dear one, I am here for you”
you must say it with your body and mind at the same time. It transforms you.
2. Recognise the presence of others-
The step after gives the time for your beloved to recognize his or her presence.
In a stressful world. If we introspect ourselves. Our body and mind do not work with each other means both are not present at the same time with each other.
Our body is somewhere and our mind is somewhere.
It is not guaranteed that you are physically present somewhere and your mind is also present there at the same time.
If you strain on your mind this phenomenon is happening to all of us.
If we are in the classroom our mind is in the playground.
If we are in the conference hall or in a meeting our mind is involved to solve family problems.
If we are with our family our mind is involved in solving office problems.
So, we have to practice to oneness our body and mind presence in one place at one time.
By practising the meditation- Breath in and Breath out.
Say this mantra” dear one, I know that you are here and it makes me very happy” with a smile to your beloved.
3. Build trust-
Lost trust is the main cause of the failure of any relationship. When there is true love there is trust.
If we have no trust in each other. There is no love.
Many people claim that he or she loves/or her very much. So, he or she started to ban their beloved. Pretend that we are concerned about the security of his or her
Like, not going somewhere lonely, not meeting with someone and not talking with someone.
If you ask them why they impose these restrictions?
The answer is that because we love his/her very much and are concerned about their security.
But the reality is that they fear that, we lost her. Therefore the fear makes them protectionist.
So, because of their protectionist nature. They underestimate the feeling of others
True love is not that which changes with time, condition, and circumstances. It is forever.
If anyone leaves you. You believe that she or he is not your true love.
Because true love is not bound by the power of time. The colour of true love will be getting thicker with the progress of time instead of having blurry.
The mantra you use for practising to know about your trust.
” Dear one, do you trust me ?”
This is an intelligent question for testing out whether your love is something real.
4. Say goodbye to your pride or ego-
To overcome pride or ego is based on the situation.
When you think that your suffering is. Because of some other. You may relief from this easily. By taking the help of your beloved.
But when you think that if your suffering is because of the person. Whom you love more.
This put you in a dilemma. Why do you take the help of that person? Who hurt you
On another hand, you know that your beloved is the medicine for your pain.
Your pride or ego raised an obstacle to demanding help from that person. Even you do not want to listen to her/his reasons. Whether he or she is guilty or not.
I would like to tell a story of a warrior and his wife. The warrior was going to war to fight for his country. His wife was pregnant at that time. Later three years. When the warrior returned from the war.
He was met with his wife and son and thanks to God and his ancestor.
They wanted to organize rituals to thank God and their ancestors for their reunion.
Warrior tells his wife to go to market and buy the product needed for the ritual.
When his wife went to market. Warrior and his son were alone in the house. Warrior was trying to convince his son to call him daddy.
But his son refused. His son replies that he is not his father. His father was someone else.
Who came every night. He sat with my mother when my mother was sitting. He Cried with my mother when my mother was crying. He Slept with my mother when my mother slept.
When the warrior listens to this. His heart froze like a chunk of ice. All happiness turns into sorrow.
When his wife return from the market. did He not recognize her presence and extended the ritual further.
He left his house and started spending his time in the wine shop. Late night, he returned home, but not talked with his wife.
These all humiliated his wife. When these all continued for several days in a row.
His wife does not tolerate this humiliation and committed suicide by the jump into the river.
When the warrior listened to this news. Returned to his house. Get lamped to the house in the night.
Suddenly his son cried out ” Mr, it’s my dad. He comes back and pointed to the shadow of his father (warrior) on the wall.
After listening this warrior crumbles down” my dear you are so far away from me. How can I raise my child all by myself”
The misconception is something that can destroy an entire family.
The misconception is like dry straw and pride is like a small spark of fire. when these two meet destroy the whole jungle(life).
Mantra practised overcoming the pride.
“Dear one I am suffering, please help”
So, if you talk with your beloved, your half problem will be solved. Because it clears all the misconceptions from your mind.
The love of your beloved help you to overcome the trap of your pride.
So, these are some practice that helps you to awaken your heart with the fragrance of true love.
So True love is not fake. Because love is with us from womb to tomb. It is basic for compassion, joy, freedom, and loving-kindness. Which makes us human and differentiated from animals.
Best of luck.
True love: practice to awakening heart- by THICH NHAT HANH
William Shakespeare’s sonnet true love- Wikipedia,
Best of luck